Yesterday, I had lunch with my BFF, Peggy, at our favorite little hole-in-the-wall Mexican food joint that we’ve frequented for decades (literally) and I made a choice that affected the remaining part of my day and virtually the entire night.
The choice? Having a diet Coke with lunch. You see…we both LOVE diet coke with tons of lime juice squeezed into it and it goes sooo well with the food. (And yes, I KNOW it’s not good for you which is why I rarely make this choice.)
The consequence? Well, I’m not good with caffeine (if you know me, you understand why…I WAKE up ready to go and have never relied on coffee to jumpstart my being). That drink made me physically shake for the rest of the day AND kept me up most of the night.
The Choice
The result of that choice? I am fuzzy and tired today and certainly not at my best.
Choices and Consequences
Most of us make choices every day that have consequences. Sometimes those consequences are positive, sometimes they are negative and sometimes they are inconsequential…i.e., don’t make much of a difference at all.
We make choices about food, drinks, alcohol, activity (to exercise or not), work, relationships, and yes, we make tons of decisions about money; ours and other people’s (credit card companies).
And often, those financial choices have both short term and long term ramifications in our lives, and the lives of others who may be depending on us for their well-being.
We have a Creative Wealth Principle that we teach in our programs that goes like this…
“People aren’t judged by their abilities but by the sum of their choices.”
I do my best to practice being nonjudgmental but, as creatures, the act of judging is inherent in our behavior, and it IS inherent for a very good reason…pure, unadulterated survival.
We must be able to judge healthy from unhealthy, good from bad, safe from dangerous, etc. When we carry those judgments into other aspects of our lives, we suffer.
What Consequences Have To Do With Truth
Consequences point backwards to our choices. Choices point backwards to our thoughts and feelings about situations in our lives; thoughts and feelings ultimately point backwards to our beliefs about everything that life entails. I use the word ‘backwards’ because, in order to evaluate your life, you must ultimately aim to uncover the root of those choices and the root is almost always tied to our deep-seated beliefs.
In the case of money, and the consequences (both good and not so good) of our financial choices, it is invariably our financial beliefs about money that cause us to choose.
Looking back at my choice yesterday to have a diet Coke at lunch with Peggy (and we won’t even talk about why we make poorer choices with others than we’d perhaps do by our lonesome!), the choice came out of my ‘feeling’ to have fun with her and from our history of enjoying the drinks with our food. The ‘feelings’ came from my thoughts that I’d like to really enjoy our lunch together and my ‘thoughts’ came from my belief that often times people have fun when they’re sharing the same sorts of things that might not necessarily be the healthiest for us (I’m NOT alone in this belief by the way! Ice cream anyone? Drink after work?).
The truth in the consequence is that my belief about our friendship can lead to an unhealthy choice on my part. The truth in the consequence of not sleeping well last night tells me that I need to work on that belief. The real truth, though, that I DO know in my heart, is that the enjoyment we have in our lunches together has absolutely nothing to do with what we do or do not drink together or do or do not eat together.
How Consequences Can Help Lead You Home
Let’s go back to the conversation about money choices. We can look at the sum total of consequences essentially as the result that we call ‘our lives.’ If you don’t like the sum of the consequences, it’s going to take a little private investigator work to figure out where the consequences came from.
In other words, this is what you’re going to do…
1) Look at the consequence that occurred from a financial decision you made.
2) Ask yourself what action you took that led you to that consequence.
3) Look at the action and ask yourself what you were feeling right before you made the choice in question.
4) Look at the feeling and remember what you were thinking.
5) Look at the thought and ask yourself what you’d have to believe about money (or whatever it was you made the choice about) in order to have the thoughts you were having.
6) Final CRITICAL step: do the necessary work to change the belief that ultimately led to the consequence you didn’t like.
Final Step is the Most Challenging Step
Realizing that human beings are creatures of habit, you already know that sometimes changing who we are choosing to be can be downright difficult, if not impossible. But you CAN change if you WANT to change badly enough.
I’m going to recommend that you read this book…Secrets of the Millionaire Mind. I’ve mentioned it before and I’m sure I’ll mention it again. It is by far the easiest, simplest, most profoundly life-changing book on financial beliefs that I’ve ever read. Do yourself a favor if you haven’t read it and go get it. If you have read it? Read it again. I read it every year! It’s that important.
OK, it’s your turn. Start looking at your life as consequences to choices and start doing a little inner work. Only when you’re willing to do the inner work will your outer life begin to change.
Let us know how you’re doing and tell us what you think about all of this. We really want to know!
Just something else to think about…